What are they saying?

Ever wonder what your animals are thinking or saying?  Everyone knows I am a dog lover but cats are great too!  I have owned several.  I was wondering what they were thinking the other day when they were looking at me with those big brown eyes and it dawned on me they think I am an a complete idiot! It was the southern equal to “Bless your heart”  I mean how many of us have tried the stupid pet tricks or played fake fetch with your dog?   You fooled a dog.  Congratulations!  What a proud moment it must have been.  Have you ever tried to balance a piece of food on their nose?  I bet they are humiliated.  I would be!  We get upset when our dog smells someone else’s crotch or licks himself.  He does it because he can!  Don’t be jealous, get over it and move on!  I yelled at Marley the other day because he went up and smelled someone’s crotch.  He looked at me like “Sorry don’t have that whole shake your hand thing down yet”  Ever wonder why dogs beg for food at the table?  I was thinking yeah I would get tired of eating the same crap every day too!  My dogs always freak out when they go to the vet?  You get tired of them pulling the chain and not wanting to go.  Lucy (My other retriever) gets all upset when she goes to the vet.  Why?  Every time she goes she is getting fixed, having shots, or something else she does not like.  She never goes to get treats or love and support.  Hell I would not want to go either.   Have you ever seen your dog wipe his butt on the carpet?  Yeah I know it’s gross but we have to wipe too sometimes, that is just there way of doing things.  I was taking my dogs for a walk a while back and they stopped at every tree, bush or shrub, ever wonder why at this?  I think they are checking for messages.  No I am no dog whisperer, but I am here to tell you they got something to say.  So next time when you get ready to yell at your pet, stop and think what they are saying.  My dog barks a lot.  I get mad but all in all he is just trying to get my attention.  Kids cry, dogs bark.  Simple as that! Gotta run my dog is barking. Until next time!!